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    6. 活著就為著等候死的到來
    莫大短篇小說選集

    活著就為著等候死的到來

    5.0分,1 ratings
    Author 莫大
    Publisher 丹陽文化公司 /丹陽文化
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    Released
    2016/03/11
    Language
    Traditional Chinese
    File format
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    Pages
    337
    ID
    59749
    ISBN
    9789575050887
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    在長久生活磨礪下,早先對生命本身的困擾,以及終極目的底探究,逐漸失卻其新鮮性與緊要感。活下去究竟為的是什麼?已不再構成問號。並不是逐步地認清,而是事實之舟在運命底河流裡地搖曳擺渡,讓我們体會出現時下底存在只是莫可奈何地賴活,意義地追尋也轉化為是怎麼樣地存活下去。然而逐步漸進地過程仍然不時祟惑著我們,提醒人們並沒有完全忘情最早的目的觀,不願意僅然只是為著生存而活下去,更且從經驗裡歸納出來底引論仍然免不去意義地探究。人性的機構運作不會讓我們完全排斥形而上底追索。

    在人世間無目標的漂泊摸索,靜心回想縱然傍惶,卻不曾覺得若何改變初衷,也沒有完全忘棄當初的疑惑,仍然椒棤踟躕於昔日蹤影蹭蹬猶豫,並且不時懷疑是什麼讓人們如此輕易拋棄往日理念,把自己的困惑居之不疑,更且作為生活上底明確底線。當然都是模稜且糢糊底內心裡底投影,從來不曾也不會明白地拿出來檢視。
    重新投身創作,自然而然駕輕就熟地拾掇起原先早已考量得滾瓜爛熟的論題,永遠有多重可能性卻絕無定論或結辯的永恆之問訊。時光在無感卻迅捷地演變中,世界確實不盡同於過往,文明的演化會淘汰過時的事物,但是人性的体驗倒不會有如此急驟差異,從事心靈探測追尋還是大可從容踩踏著蝸牛的腳步慢慢向前跫行。錯誤依舊照著原有的轍跡重蹈,智慧並未曾因慘痛的代價地累積而再生。更有甚者,人的知識或辨識底智能全都是經驗底歸納,不會有超越所處時代底曠代之音,所有的作者只是模擬時代發聲,無論若何絕對超不出生長的世代。
    縱然能即時平撫心血結晶不會不值如許焦心竭慮,但是對自己過去作品的回顧,卻常會擔心失去對週遭脈動的符應,很不願意在短短的三十年間,就失去寫作當時感應。急驟改變演化的社會,隨時會令當令的創作變成過時時裝般底不合宜。然而總懷著僥倖底体認,重覆確定人性的改變急驟不來的,也許百年更或千年才能辨得出差異。誠然生化科學及醫學技術的演進使得生老病死也在改觀。然而仍然還只是短暫頃刻地体會,我們還在拭目以待,不能覺察更大底變革已在發生。人間世事仍舊愚頑地按照歷史迂迴底軌跡,頻頻一再重覆。也因之往復不知多少遍的同樣幾道題材,在生生不息的人際盲動中永不曾失去新鮮及興味。人們還是憂慮著同樣的處境與困惑,懷著他們祖先經歷過的同樣煩惱:作著一樣無益的掙扎努力,懷抱一樣歷久不滅的貪奢欲念。作家們無論怎樣努力,也仍然刻畫同樣歷經千百遍底彫鑿。
    可是文學本身乃是歧異的個別性產物,是各個生命間無法證同的記錄。就像每一個各自的人是不同的,每個人的臉面是不同的,背後代表的個性及生平遭遇也不相同。籠統的述說同異只是急速求取統計上的方便,文學的作用完全跟計算統合沒有干係,它從事的是細緻地分辨生命裡的遷延變革,是記錄及發抒各個体本身無從認同的遭遇。
    這本集子所彙集的文字已橫亙跨越三十餘年,早期作品泰半逸失,倖存部份已全都收錄於此彙編內,頗為遺憾保存不力,這也是急著發表印行的理由。這麼些年來的歷鍊曾經使我以為確切底理解生活是怎麼回事,覺得長久以來地沈思與歷鍊已足以解釋人生大部份的問題。誠然浸淫返顧之餘,很清楚地復加肯定:生命絕不會因歷鍊而真正長進,年齡及不斷地吸取學習除了帶來自以為是的認知而外,只有疲倦與衰頹。人永遠在原地踏步,所有歸納得來的判別,都還只是墮入同樣自欺欺人的老舊環結。
    我的文學企圖一直令自己處在自我警惕當中,不間斷地努力以赴,為的是試圖採取直敘的方式來陳述事件,只述及事件而再無其他。放棄久已耽逸而且己成為慣性地分析或者歸納的方式來論斷故事,顯然這裡面的作品看來全然不成功,但可見在轉變中。其實也不見得就確定願意全然屈就這個樣式繼續從事創作,我不是海明威也不想學他。矛盾依然,我要真實,但又不可能接受赤裸裸底事實,沒法讓確切熟悉的人或事呈現在創作裡面,我所想像的世界雖符應並完全取材真實,但絕非現實,這實是生命底逃遁之所在。
    文學上的寫實主義絕對有其不可取代性,猶有別於其他藝術的表現形式。尤其在後現代主義盛行的現今文壇更有其重要性。長久以來自己一直是個熱衷的表現主義者,繪書上尤其是不斷地浸淫探勘德奧畫家創作與演進。然而自己從事表現方法則一貫地困擾而且猶豫不決。寫作經驗是從記憶裡頭將文字一個個地拾掇排列出來,如設想稍周全或者說意識凝聚成形就能按文句成段底排列下去,但也都是將過往學習或感受或經驗歸納整理底結果,當然如有幸者,就是將交互出現底意念分別塗鴉出來,或是整個地臚列成文字。由於文學是出於對個体生存的狀態或情境底細緻地追述刻劃或抒懷,絕不是對整体生存狀態的探討。所以內中含蘊底內容都是療傷止痛。生命本質是朝向終點不斷消流喪失,對如此情境的轉錄、追想、演繹或諷嘲自然不容真正的樂觀主義者出沒其間。
    人性的弔詭是文學的脊髓,為欲求脅迫的人們永恆地將自己處於極端困窘之境,人類所有的出處都乖違天性底自然順應,更有進者人類所憑藉存在的各類型的自然環境或人文社會更是提供拮抗爭鬥底原始或次級戰鬥之所。求取更美好的生存條件與狀態的本能,使人們永不安於現狀。生命過程與生活環境逼使人們永恆地處於抗爭態勢,此乃是人之所以存在之意義底緣起,也就是所有文學依附所歸。當然可以換個更明白底說法:文學豐富的泉源是來自個人自身適應自然法則的生存延續辦法;且極度自覺適應不良而後的副產品。而生存延續的衝動與適應是內裡底脈動血緣。愛慾情仇、生老病死永是文學真切底骨幹。
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    1離
    2瘼
    3懵聵
    4營塋
    5夢日幻記
    6消逝的氤氳
    7森林裡的孤寂
    8活著就為著等候死的到來
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    作者:莫大
    莫大,台灣大學科班出生的文學家,畢業初期即發表〈悲秋〉於中國時報,一鳴驚人。
    其作品內容取材及體裁極富變化與多樣性,相當具文學原創性。
    暢銷作品:《從人間到地獄21天》、《換妻記》、《乳環》(莫大短篇小說集)、《曠野》、《領袖的鐵衛隊》……等。
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    Details

    Released
    2016/03/11
    Language
    Traditional Chinese
    File format
    PDF: Fit in large screen
    Provide Adobe DRM
    Provide PDF
    Offer DRM free license
    No
    ID
    59749
    ISBN
    9789575050887

    短篇小說選集

    莫大

    莫大短篇小說選集

    等候死的到來

    活著

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